- Some say that “it takes family members on average approximately four to eight years to recover from the emotional and financial expense of a bitter divorce”. The problem with litigated divorces, in most cases, is that there is no possible resolution of the emotional issues, how can there be? Well, it’s easy, you are not even doing the talking or negotiating your lawyers are, which not surprisingly most often results in a decrease in trust and an increase in resentment towards your ex.
- As a mediator, my goal is to try my best to educate people on the benefits of mediation. Unfortunately, when people separate the first thing that pops in their mind is “I better get a lawyer” rare are those who say, “I better get a mediator”.
And that’s quite unfortunate because mediators can:
- – save clients thousands of dollars in legal, medical, psychological & emotional costs (Lawyer, psychologist, doctor (pills).
- – focus parties on creating the best possible future for themselves and their children by guiding them through brainstorming sessions and coming up with the most “out of the box” options tailored to their needs and those of their children.
- – help parties feel understood by allowing and encouraging them to express their feelings, concerns and fears.
- – help parties transition from a “spousal” relationship to a “co-parent” one.
- – empower clients by providing them the tools to be at their best not their worse (communicating, cooperating and making compromises).
- – help parties take ownership of their future by making decisions for themselves & their children rather than having courts or judges impose their own judgment
- – help parties create a clear and comprehensive roadmap of their future by creating a Parenting Plan that is focussed on the best interests of their children.
And finally, mediators can help parties look back at this whole separation process with a feeling of accomplishment of being capable of raising above their pain, anger, sadness to focus on what was important for them and their children, all this while keeping their dignity and self-respect.
- Try mediation what do you have to lose….
